Look out world!

So, I have been self-reflective today. It has been one of those times when I decide that I have to change. And so I am going to. I have to...I am bugging myself!

Here is the thing. For some reason I have always devalued myself, as in my opinions, ideas, preferences, etc. If someone disagrees with me, I just assume that I am the wrong one, at least in that conversation. I don't know why, but for some reason I have decided that everyone else is more qualified for life. I think that is why I struggle to keep up with this blog. I feel like no one should care about what I think about anything and I don't want to be presumptuous enough to think they do.

Also, if anyone voices a preference for doing something one way or wanting something, I will always go with that instead of what is best for me. Most times it doesn't matter and I am happy to do what is best for them, but sometimes I am terribly inconvienced because I feel like I cannot impose my preferences on anyone.

But I am done. I'm not going to swing too far mind you, but I am going to change. I think this is why I have always been a homebody - I am me when I am at home, either with my parents or my husband. I am confident in my ideas, opinions, actions and desires. But for some reason that stops when I walk out the door.

Not any more though. I have ideas, good ones in fact. I have opinions about life and they are just as valid as anyone else's, and it is okay if they don't agree. And sometimes it is okay to do things the way that is best for me. Okay, now I just need to keep saying these things to myself until I can do it. I really don't know why I feel like I am not as valid as anyone else, but I am working on it. Fortunately I am married to a psychologist who can help me with assertiveness. Wish me luck!